“We are constantly trying to hold it all together. If you really want to see why you do things, then don’t do them and see what happens.” ― Michael A. Singer
I’ve reached a breaking point with certain aspects of my life and I’m ready to fully embrace the intent of this quote. Why do we do the things we do?
A therapist gave me really good advice once, “When you step in to intervene, you might be robbing someone of growth”. Those words have always stuck with me and today they ring true.
When I left the San Francisco financial tech start-up, they essentially offered me the job of being the manager for the nonexistent, future happiness team. “Just because I can, doesn’t mean I should” was my response. I wish I had listened more to my past self. There are so many things I’ve spent so much time and energy on because I was the only who could. I completely lost sight of the “should” part. Thinking a step further, I was so excited I could do so much that it outshined my additional layer of “should”.
I return to “should” often these days. I’m enjoying seeing how I feel when I don’t do things. What feels like a relief? What causes pain? What do I forget I ever did? We are more adaptable than we let ourselves realize and this is a two sided gift. I’m learning and appreciating both sides deeply right now. What have I adapted to and overcome? What have I adapted to that I need to move passed?
Time will tell. I sense that growth is afoot and a new wind is picking up carrying me in a different direction.