goldilocks’ dream - what about this theory. the fear of not being enough. and the fear of being 'too much.' are exactly the same fear. the fear of being you. — .. (@nayyirahwaheed) November 16, 2018 I sometimes long for the day when I’m “just right” – Goldilocks’ dream. I imagine we all feel that way as we […]
Strangers & Staring - I have a sabbatical next year for 3 months. 3 glorious months of no work and, right now, no plans. Recently, the idea of spending as much time as possible outdoors has crossed my mind. Nature fills me up and centers me so spending as much time within it seems ideal. There’s a catch though […]
As close as we can - My card got declined today while grocery shopping. It was ironic as I have been “home” in San Diego for an extended period of time yet still somehow managed to set off alarm bells with some bot overlord in charge of tracing fraudulent activity. It normally only happens when I’m on the road and forgetful […]
Don’t do them - “We are constantly trying to hold it all together. If you really want to see why you do things, then don’t do them and see what happens.” ― Michael A. Singer I’ve reached a breaking point with certain aspects of my life and I’m ready to fully embrace the intent of this quote. Why do […]
Start the clock - I am writing a book and it will be a collection of thoughts about surrogacy. I have no clue how long it’ll take. I have no clue if I’ll ever finish it. I just know I need to go from a “One day I’ll write a book” to “I am writing a book” mentality.  I […]
Real reason - It alway amazes me in my nomading when I find comfort in a still new and unknown place. This past weekend I went to Chicago and stayed with a dear friend from high school. I explored the city a ton by foot whereas in visits past I mainly relied on public transit and lyfts. I […]
Restless - After months of random, one off strangers dealing with my hair on a 3-5 week basis, I have a barber. I call. She knows me and recognizes my voice when I call – “Anne? Hey! When works to get you in?”. I went in yesterday as the news of the lottery broke. As many humans […]
Tips for Distinguishing Between Self Care & Self Enabling - Yesterday, I realized I hadn’t left my room except to eat, go to the gym, and get coffee. Usually this situation would be cause for concern for me but, strangely, I realized I had actually had a really wonderful and productive day staring incessantly at my computer screen. This led me down a path I […]
Automattic: 4 Year Anniversary - This is the loudest thought in my head when I think about 4 years of working at Automattic – “How did my world become so vast? How did I get so lucky?”. My only fear is that my luck will run out as this opportunity feels so rare. Looking back, my world was so terribly small […]
absorbed entirely - “You are constantly told in depression that your judgment is compromised, but a part of depression is that it touches cognition. That you are having a breakdown does not mean that your life isn’t a mess. If there are issues you have successfully skirted or avoided for years, they come cropping back up and stare […]