I haven’t taken more than 2 days off at a time since working at Automattic. I’m coming up on my one year and am realizing that going forward I need extended periods of time off more often. Today hit me like a ton of bricks and completely stopped me in my tracks. I’ve being gone full steam for so long that when I was able to take a break and let me adrenaline stop… I could barely move or get up off the couch. Thankfully, I managed to get a 4.4 mile run in thanks to my girlfriend’s encouragement/support this morning. Somehow my body knows when I’ve decided to let it rest and takes full advantage of it when I do though. My body feels physically heavy and the thought of doing anything remotely useful fades. Part of me wonders if it’s because I made it get up so early this AM to run. On top of that, I made the mistake of hyper structuring my first day off and I’m paying the price for it today on day 2. Hell, trying to figure out a title for this post was hard enough let alone just writing this out. I know I need to though so I can look back and remember to take a step back.
It’s hard to tell in these moments if I’m crashing (the term I use for when I’m headed towards a depressive down spiral) or if it’s just my body’s way of taking care of me. I’ve had less caffeine than normal as well so I’ve been uneasy about what it might be. Am I getting depressed? Am I going through caffeine withdrawal? Am I already depressed?! Am I working too much and this is the aftermath? I’m very all or nothing so it could also just be a symptom of that aspect of my personality 😉
Regardless, these last 48 hours have been very needed periods of rest. I’m looking forward to tomorrow – another day of no expectations.
P.S. this featured image is from a museum in Vancouver. I love the idea the author portrays – the idea of taking longer stretches of time off throughout your life rather than waiting for retirement. One thing I love about Automattic is that it lets me live in this in between world where I can be present in a city, leave/travel on a whim, and yet still give back to those around me.
Long story short, lesson learned: take longer stretches off. Your body and your life will thank you.