Recently, I’ve been stuck on two concepts.
- What got me to this point in life isn’t necessarily what will help me get through the future. A coping mechanism of the past can hold me back in the future. It’s important for me to revisit this, question myself, and grow.
- It’s a fine art as an adult to learn what to stay sensitive to. It’s feeling increasingly easy to choose desensitization and normalization over staying sensitive, aware, and engaged. Life is long and I don’t want to burn out in a quick flame.
The first concept touches on how I navigate the world externally and the latter is about my own internal navigation. Both work hand in hand as being sensitive to something can be overwhelming causing one to fall back on learned coping mechanisms that one must be vigilant about fine tuning. It’s a balancing act. What I suddenly choose to not be as sensitive to might also cause a coping mechanism of the past to be rendered useless. For example, working out use to be a way for me to process and escape. As life settled, I had less of a desire to work out until I switched my thinking around it as a coping mechanism less to escape with and more to take care of myself with.
I haven’t figured any of it out yet other than becoming more aware of the interplay of the two and pausing to reflect more often.