33

I’m on hold for a virtual doctor’s appointment as I write this. I flared my back about a month ago, was on the right track to getting better, and then made some missteps that have me nervous about flying to Florence, Italy tomorrow. At the same time, I used Claude to spin up a new PR in Gutenberg to further a conversation about whether to build on another PR I merged this morning while waiting for coffee from my phone. Amidst the despondency of not being able to go on a long bike ride today or have a tough workout, I’m also picking my head up to feel how fortunate I am to have healthcare, have a job, have things that interest and pull at me, have the ability to very recently take 2 weeks off and turn my phone/computer off, have people who love and care for me, and have things to look forward to.

I received a handful of cards for my birthday, which always brings the most joy, including a hand written card from one of my tiny pen pals (a childhood friend’s oldest kid). I love a physical card. My partner surprised me with three cards which felt right to her for 33. She also managed to snag me a balloon that she hid in our apartment’s shower without my knowing any better.

I am so thankful for this last year and so much comes to mind: changing my relationship to sugar (daily to a few times a week), trips with loved ones, recurring chronic comrade calls, my partner meeting my parents and wider cousins in a cherished spot in NC, my parents coming out to Seattle to visit me, going to Oklahoma to spend more time with my family there, playing soccer again after so many injuries, re-building muscle and endurance (before this recent back flare), having some cool career moments and opportunities for growth, moving in with my partner in order to better support each other and offer an easier financial time for me to nomad more, nomading more, hitting some financial milestones, bike packing for the first time, learning wilderness first aid basics, petting lots of dogs, and endless time outside. Here’s a glimpse:

At the same time, there have been some really difficult moments navigating the healthcare system with my partner and watching her truly suffer from chronic migraines in a way most can’t understand. These bodies are so fragile and, as I still wait to get in touch with a doctor who can hopefully get me some rushed anti-inflammatories, I’m reminded of it too.

33 will be off to a lovely start–I’ll be in Florence for three weeks, the first with work and the latter two for fun. My mom will join for the latter two and her best friend for one of those weeks. We’ve been to a long list of countries and it’s fantastic to start 33 this way: working on hard, important problems with people who care and then spending a luxurious amount of time working/playing in Florence in a way that brings others with me. I only want more of the same and it’s a privilege to say that and to have gotten to a place where I have the big pieces that make my life rich and meaningful. Looking at the year ahead, I feel pulled in two ways: shoring up some friendships and reaching further out into the community around me. I am in such a wonderful neighborhood with so much happening and I have barely taken advantage of it. I started early as I love to do by going to a meditation group a few blocks from me last Sunday and I already have a running list of other opportunities I want to explore (city fruit picking?!) when I return from this somewhat final bout of extended travel for hopefully a few months. I didn’t think Seattle was a place I would stay and as I have suddenly found myself four years on having “stayed”, I want to approach how I spend my time here differently. Let’s see what 33 has in store. Thank you to everyone who was a part of 32: the good, the bad, the ugly. This life is not meant to be done alone and I am the most profoundly grateful for the interdependence I have.