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Blog

For a fuller view of my writing beyond my recent posts, dive in below and peruse as much or as little as you’d like. I write about a wide range of topics from WordPress to Surrogacy to Photography to Mental Health. Don’t follow me if you want to only hear about a certain topic as I write based on what comes up for me in that moment of time. As always, thanks for reading.

  • Big yes

    I have a fantastic problem – I am finding it increasingly hard to figure out what to say “no” to. How do you prioritize when there’s impact to be made all around you? Any system I attempt to come up with feels so artificial and selfish. This is when “it’s a marathon not a sprint” […]

  • Purposefully chosen

    I spend a lot of time in airports (like I am now). Sometimes I’ll wander along in the terminal staring at the different locations folks are headed wondering to myself: Who is going home? Who is escaping? What would it be like to go there? Would I like it? What would I do when I arrive? […]

  • the difference

    There’s a really thin line in my relationship with anxiety between enabling myself and in prioritizing self care. I don’t quite know how to handle it or what the difference is. It reminds me of how my mom must have felt when I was in 4th or 5th grade dealing with undiagnosed mono for eternity […]

  • For a change

    I was on the phone with a friend recently when she was lamenting the fact that one of her ex’s instagram story kept accidentally popping up when she was watching other people’s stories. “UGH it pains me because I know they can see I was looking too when I didn’t even want to see it in […]

  • a massive exception

    I’ve had some really bad anxiety days. Days where I’ve dragged myself to class only to fall asleep in every single one barely keeping afloat because I haven’t slept the night before. Days where I’ve been so anxious that someone closing a door too loudly causes me to panic and want to immediately leave whatever situation […]

  • Knowledge is anxiety

    I signed up for 23andme a while back and have loved it thus far likely because there hasn’t been any glaring news or flashing reports saying “you will die tomorrow”. This is good news. I’m lucky in that I have very good “genes”. Just over a year ago, I found out from my birthmom that […]

  • Actions anyone can take to help diversity & inclusion

    I got involved in Diversity and Inclusion work at Automattic in three very simple ways that didn’t involve me having any special skill, role, level of experience, or years at the company. For folks who might want to get involved but don’t know how, I think you’ll find these three ways to be the building […]

  • On being needed

    At Automattic, I’m a team lead in charge of wrangling cats other Humans. I’m naturally a “fixer” and “doer” so this role isn’t completely outside my comfort zone. Recently, I crossed the 2 years of being a team lead and it’s created a strange crisis of “what do I want to do now?”. Fair warning: I […]

  • Holes in shoes

    I almost have a hole in my shoe. It’s not quite there yet but I’m nearing the due date for my nearly yearly samba replacement pair. I wait to buy another pair even as the shoe wears thin. I like the feeling of really worn out shoes — as if in some way this tangible and […]

  • Automattic: 3 Year Anniversary

    What I listened to while writing.  Just prior to this, I was scrolling through Automattic‘s Bridge team’s updates (think of our bridge team as you would a formal C level team). I like to end my day in randomness if I can. There’s so much to learn at Automattic and so much information being generated day […]

  • Best Job Advice I’ve Ever Received

    I think by the end of my job search in San Francisco, I had applied to over 90 jobs. That pattern seems to match though – I applied to 18 schools when applying for college. During the Great Panic of 2014 (my new affectionate name for one of the most stressful times of my life), […]

  • Remote =! Lazy or Easy

    When I tell people about my job at Automattic working wherever I want, people begin riffing about how much easier life would be with a remote job. It starts innocuous enough: “I could go to the gym whenever I wanted! I could sleep in!”. Fairly quickly though, the conversation goes down a path of working […]

  • Saying yes – three years later

    This time 3 years ago, I accepted a job at Automattic and nervously prepared to tell my current employer I was leaving their super shiny San Francisco start up after joining on as employee #16. Currently, I’m sitting in the Copenhagen airport on the way to Orlando (where I’m from) after spending 2 weeks in […]

  • It really hits

    “Once in a while it really hits people that they don’t have to experience the world in the way they have been told to.” ― Alan Keightley I’ve never wanted a tattoo but I imagine if I did it I would feel the way I do about this quote. It’s been rumbling in me these last […]

  • Dear caffeine

    I didn’t think I could live without you. You were my routine. You were my comfort zone. I trusted you to help me be social when I just wanted to hermit and hide. You calmed my nervous hands. You steadied my mind. You kept me up late. You woke me up early. Over the years, […]

  • Standing in another’s digital shoes

    While sitting in a coffee shop trying to read this AM, I found myself texting Chris. Chris is the embodiment of eclectic and readily accepts any brain dumps I seem to offer him from time to time with grace, humor, and wit. As we were rapid fire texting messaging today, two ideas I’ve been mulling […]

  • Left a mark

    I was clearing out browser tabs this morning trying to declutter my digital life after making a small effort to clear up my physical one when I stumbled upon this article I had open. I nearly closed it outright but after a quick scroll up & down the page decided it was short enough to […]

  • Practical Diversity & Inclusion

    Over my three years at Automattic, I’ve worked a great deal on diversity and inclusion. I recently decided to take a step back and, upon reflecting, I wanted to share one of the biggest lessons I learned: often folks will jump to help with seemingly insolvable problems but their minds go blank once the magic […]

  • Two dimensions of writing

    I was chatting with someone over the weekend at San Diego Pride when I realized an interesting habit I have that might influence the way I perceive the world. We were talking about using writing as a way to process vs as a way to preserve memories. It’s a favorite topic of mine so apologies […]

  • Sense of sacredness

    This past weekend, I went to Santa Barbara for the first time to reunite with one of my rugby teammates, Katie. We hadn’t seen each other in over two years yet have managed to keep in touch via thesis length text messages randomly. She’s actually one of my my rugby “littles” (we call them “newbies”) […]

  • Frozen fragments

    We are the swiping generation. We put people in boxes but we just call them phones now. We ask for data points rather than stories. We ask for facts rather than feelings. We demand people define themselves over and over and over when we all know 140 characters can’t fit even a fragment of ourselves. […]

  • Somehow

    It’s officially been a year since I moved to San Diego. I moved here with a backpack worth of stuff, a vague idea of why I was doing what I was doing, and barely any energy to think too much about any of it. I was at my end and I had decided this place […]

  • Beautiful things & happy moments

    I love this image, the idea, the quote – all of it. As a contact wearer since the 4th grade, it resonated deeply since I first saw it years ago and has made me pause to this day each time I have to replace my contacts. It’s almost like I have a moment of silent happiness […]

  • Precious correspondence

    In 2003, I was featured in a newsletter for an organization called El Hogar. I barely remember it. I do vividly remember someone coming to talk to the church about El Hogar and being captured by the stories. I like to act especially in times when it’s obvious help is needed. It seems I had […]

  • A broom

    “Once in a while it really hits people that they don’t have to experience the world in the way they have been told to.” -Alan Keightley I spoke with someone about minimalism a couple of months ago. We were so on the same page about how much of a hassle too much stuff is, how […]

  • Craving silence

    I jumped on a call the other day for work. I didn’t want to speak. I struggled to muster words. I was craving silence. I didn’t realize until recently how much of my life is filled with noise. Music in the car. Music at the coffee shop. Music at the gym. Music while I work. Podcasts […]

  • Surrogacy & Handmaid’s Tale

    I read Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood in high school. At the time, I don’t remember it affecting me too much. I remembered the Latin phrase “don’t let the bastards grind you down” more than I remembered the full plot line likely due to being in Latin class at the time. Watching the book play […]

  • Hit of clarity

    There’s turbulence on the plane and I love the fear it sends through me. I love the clarity it gives on my life. Growing up in the times of 9/11 has made the act of stepping on a plane an act of facing one’s mortality even when we’re all more likely to die from a […]

  • I opened the blinds today

    Of note, started writing this the day I got back yet finished it later.  I opened the blinds today to let light pour into my apartment in San Diego. I just got back from Paris last night and my body currently thinks it’s 9:30PM. I’m not sure if it was the inordinate amount of wine and […]

  • Snooze-less existence

    It’s 7AM and I’m at my favorite coffee shop in San Diego. I woke up at 6:15AM and hit snooze once (likely because I fell asleep at 2AM). 10 min later and I was up. The last two months I’ve been hitting snooze. I’ll have a call at 8am and set my alarm for 7am […]