For a fuller view of my writing beyond my recent posts, dive in below and peruse as much or as little as you’d like. I write about a wide range of topics from WordPress to Surrogacy to Photography to Mental Health. Don’t follow me if you want to only hear about a certain topic as I write based on what comes up for me in that moment of time. As always, thanks for reading.
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Emotional consent update
It’s been over a year since I originally wrote about consent & emotional intimacy and I’m relieved to say that in that time I’ve had ample practice bringing this concept into my conversations with strangers and loved ones alike. To quote Past Anne: What’s the right way to go about this? How do we build consent into our conversations? Do we always put the onus on the other person to draw the line or can we find a way to draw the lines together? If I get any sort of grand insight in the coming years of my life, I’ll…
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Blurring days
I just finished writing a set of “photo” postcards to various people in my life — a childhood camp counselor turned friend, a current coworker, a former rugby teammate, a childhood friend, two toddler age cousins. I print out recent photos I’ve taken and scribble short notes on the back before shipping them off. In writing them, I found myself stuck on this idea of how to live intentionally during these times especially as my days continue to blur. In the past, when I’ve experienced blurring days, it’s been after trauma or a horrible life event. I came to recognize…
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Conversation menus
6 months ago I bought this pack of “conversation menus”. As a lover of deep conversation and intentionally connecting, this was such a fun thing to get my hands on. Cut to early April, I started running biweekly “Queerantine” chats with a random gathering of LGBTQ+ friends in my life who I wanted to know each other (everyone is in different cities and from very different parts of my life). To help build depth in those conversations, I started creating my own conversation menus and wanted to share what I came up with so others can use them during these odd…
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happy place
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raise a toast
After traveling so much, I found in pre-pandemic times that I could lull myself into an extremely zen-like state as I boarded long flights. I rarely tried to read a book, catch up on work, or make that time “worth it”. Instead, once I got through the stress of security and knew I had plenty of time to board, I eased into a calmness knowing I had nothing to do except be still. I’d relish in watching movies, catching up on my favorite podcasts, or sleeping for longer than I should (never helps with jetlag). I feel in between destinations…
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human wish
I went on a long, arduous 15 mile hike yesterday. As I was heading back, I paused to really take in my surroundings. When I’m fatigued and have a long way back, I’ll sometimes just put my head down and forget to take in the nature I’m trying to escape to. The moment I did, I looked up and saw a small white blob pop through the trees lining a hillside ahead. “No freaking way” I scrambled up the hillside quietly and as slowly as I could only to find a parent and baby mountain goat! I kept my distance,…
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conversational shorthand
I’m pinning down words today. I write a half formed sentence and get up to walk around my apartment. At one point, I lie fully on the ground headphones on jamming to music. As the next sentence comes to me, I leap back to my chair. I have three drafts of very different blog posts all half written along with two voice recordings of thoughts I have for even more writing that I feel I’ll never get to. I suffer from a perpetual backlog of what I could share. I’ve tasked myself today with meaningfully responding to a soul filling…
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Wish you were here
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don’t step away
I was walking through the woods when my eye glanced at a beautiful wildflower. I had likely passed dozens like it before but somehow this one managed to snag my attention. I paused to capture a few photos. As I briefly flipped through the images sorting and deleting, I kept the one below. I loved the way one has to work to really see it because that’s how it felt when I discovered it. The act of viewing matches the act of capturing the image: Recently while I’ve been out exploring nature, I’ve caught myself taking it for granted and…
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never graceful
Some days I wake up with a budding heartbreak. I sense it’s with me the moment I come to and have learned to make space for what I need to feel as the day goes on. As I meditated today, I doubled over unable to keep myself upright. It somehow felt more comfortable and necessary to fold into myself to properly honor what was spinning through my mind. I found myself fidgeting unable to stay still as my heartache grew. When I was younger, there were direct causes for feeling this way. It was usually as simple as hurting for…
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one way or another
I don’t have many words to offer today. Instead, I’ll leave you with pictures I’ve taken over the last week that, in one way or another, refreshed my spirit. After spending months craving mountains, desperate for their inspiration, I can’t get enough.
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too many places
It’s my last day in San Diego for at least the coming 6 months of my life. I paused more than I usually do to look around, breath a bit deeper, and take in one more palm tree. It was overcast all day today. I joked to myself that it was either San Diego forcing my hand to tempt me back for a final sunny day or the city mourning my departure! I returned to San Diego 2 years ago after a 6 month “full time” nomading spree (aka sans homebase). I drove straight from Moab, Utah here catching the…
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this pause
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt: Write about a time when you (or your character) experienced something that may be a common human event (for example: scratching an itch, sneezing, petting an animal, etc.), with concrete language that brings the experience to life. Try using all of the senses in order to avoid cliché. The glass shattered in my hand in an instant. I was so deep in my thoughts that I considered maybe I had accidentally broken…
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mentally drooling
Is it possible to be too attached to not having attachments? I’m moving in a few weeks which has resulted in my weekends being spent eying my belongings suspiciously. To make matters worse, there was a mass break-in to a bunch of cars including mine a few months ago. Turns out the robbers were clever enough to find ways to mimic certain cars’ unlocking mechanism causing them to easily open even locked cars (mine was locked). I’m now playing this game of “what am I down with being stolen?” when I look at my belongings on top of “what can…
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hear your voice
My grandma called me today. I missed the call only noticing it 30 minutes later. At 93 paralyzed on half of her body from a stroke years ago, it’s a feat of will that she wrestled with technology to call me. I generally hate phone calls. I find them awkward and exhausting with every non verbal cue stripped away. I feel as if I’m trapped in a conversation and never seem to know how to properly wrap up a call in a reasonable amount of time. I was nervous to call her back. Was something wrong? It’s rare that we…
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feel with me
Do you ever feel a longing to write but without any words to wrangle into sentences? It feels like wanting to cook but opening the fridge to find it empty. It feels like when you can’t remember the name of something obvious. I’ve been sitting with this tip of the tongue feeling all day hoping it’ll fade. I’ve had this happen more frequently since the pandemic hit. I’ll have a vision of what to say floating in my head yet it feels like a much bigger ask to translate it into concrete, sensible words. Thinking more about this, it’s actually…
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a wonderful goodbye
I’ve been thinking a ton about goodbyes recently. While meditating this morning, these thoughts gripped me anew making me appreciate this part of myself even more. I think it’s a reaction to being so far away from loved ones and my brain blending memories together. Who was the last person I hugged? How did my last goodbye go to my grandma? Did I make sure to give her a second hug before leaving? I’ve always been a believer in solid goodbyes — undistracted, intentional, heartfelt goodbyes. I’m lucky to have a few friends who embrace this aspect of me and…
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excuse for vulnerability
Last week, on a whim born out of caffeine and restlessness, I created an event on my calendar and added 6 close LGBTQ+ friends to it who, for a variety of reasons, I felt would gel. The event description read as follows: This is a standing weekly invite to chat with some queeeeer folks. Some of you know each other. Some of you don’t at all! It just seemed like a great excuse to continue connecting fellow awesome LGBTQ+ folks in my life during this strange time. – I’ll send out a zoom link 5-10 min before the call starts. –…
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already knowing the answer
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Your prompt for today: Make a short list of texts from your past, even better if you can select particular passages or moments that meant something to you. Without necessarily revisiting the book (you can do that later), start writing about your relationship to it, in narrative terms. When did you read it? What was your life at the time? Write a scene of your reading it, replete with all the ways it…
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anyone not willing
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt What’s the funniest thing that happened to you last year? Write a paragraph from the point of view of an inanimate object that bore witness to it. Could be your hat. Could be your wedding ring, a streetlamp or the plant in the corner of the bar. Use as much sensory/sensual language as possible to describe the memory from that object’s perspective. I don’t just bear witness to Anne’s world–I capture it.…
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shiny new calmness
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt: I invite you to reflect on a new beginning that was meaningful for you. You might think about a literal beginning: new job, relationship, state of being (pre-child to parent, singledom to marriage). You might think about a new conviction, habit, or a crucial choice you made: when you decided to stop apologizing all the time, that summer you actually started meditating, or the day you stopped drinking. Tell the story of…
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leftover intensity
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example).Prompt Choose a line from a book—you can grab the nearest one and flip it open to a random page, or pick an old favorite you’ve memorized by heart. Whatever grabs your attention; whatever intrigues. Use it as the opening sentence for today’s journal entry, and let the words flow from there. “Days at home often blur into one another; days in strange surroundings intensify life.” – Far and Away by Andrew Solomon What…
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a parade of red flags
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt Write about a time where you were dead wrong about someone. I have major lacunae in my judgment of others. I’m adept at finding rare, lovely souls and horrible at realizing rotten ones. I’m regularly wrong about people and it’s never in a positive way. The vast majority of people sit in the “generally good” pile in my mind with a small group reaching near mental sainthood. That “generally good” label shouldn’t…
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ever since
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt: Pick five time periods, ages, or moments from your life—they can be spread out or all clustered together. Don’t think too hard about your choices, just write down the first one that comes to mind and move to the next. Example:1. First grade.2. Jr. high.3. Sleeping in a Buick (age 17).4. Stripping in Texas (age 20).5. Getting sober (age 25). With me so far? Feeling admiration for my life choices? Great! Next…
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my end of the deal
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Random Aside In full disclosure, I’m behind on these prompts after a chaotic end of the week with work. I feel a gnawing sense that I need to give each prompt my undivided attention and time but I simply can’t do that. It’s not sustainable. I don’t want to miss out on the new thoughts that comes from thinking about new things. I’m compromising–I shall still respond to each but I will do…
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hug a mountain
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt Okay, close your eyes. Maybe lie down so you’re cozy? A blanket is nice. Okay. What do you see? At first, it’s dark in there. But if you really look, you will start to see pictures. Maybe it’s a bear with claws, or an ice cream cone, or a memory. Like, cuddling your mom. Maybe it’s words, like LOVE or DANCING. Sometimes it’s just tinkly lights. Whatever you see, write about it.…
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quiet
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt Find a good spot in front of your favorite window. What do you see? Write about the view—this can be a description of what’s unfolding right now, or you can branch off into a fictional reality. Maybe the window is open and sounds, smells, and a breeze are slipping in; maybe there are people in the street, maybe it’s empty. Either way, record the moment. It’s as if San Diego’s Weather knows…
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half
I’m doing an isolation journal prompt series and welcome you to join! I’m only sharing responses to prompts that feel acceptable enough to share (don’t involve others for example). Prompt Write a travel journal entry from your home, could be your living room, could be your bed. Write as though you’ve just arrived in a new place (because, in many ways, you have) and what you’re observing about the place and how you feel in it. Write what you see, hear, and touch, as though it’s all brand new. What are you learning about yourself in this different land, with…
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still a part
I’ve been thinking about time and how it moves within this strange period of humanity we’re in. I have sharp memories of time moving differently throughout my life—I think we all do. Usually, life has a normal cadence to it. We perform our daily rituals and we adjust to the 40 hour work week with a weekend leftover like a blank slate for us to fill. Right now, I feel time pass in a novel way with the overarching daily panic and deeply limited days coalescing. In college, a friend came to visit me who I have an extremely complicated…
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Informed vs driven
In tech, there’s often talk of being data informed over data driven. Pulled from the linked article: Data-driven: You let the data guide your decision-making process Data-informed: You let data act as a check on your intuition When data guides your decision making, you’re always collecting more of it to have the most accurate models and find trends. But here’s the catch—data is never going to tell you the full story, and it’s never going to tell you exactly what you need to do next to keep growing. Too many companies think data should be their only guide and wind up over-optimizing…
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